No Contender

[Nemesis]

Grease Paint and Monkey Brains by White Zombie begins to play over the speakers. Jester comes out from backstage and walks down the aisle with the hardcore title draped over one of his shoulders. He enters the ring and looks around for a microphone but cannot find one. He laughs a little at this and comments.

"How am I supposed to talk to all my beloved fans now?"

Jester pretends to think about what to do next by tapping his fingers to his head. He quickly snaps them together and makes a face as if he knows what to do. He climbs outside the ring and pulls something out from underneath the turnbuckle. He throws the object in the ring and the fans can see it is a megaphone. Jester rolls back in the ring and grabs the megaphone and shouts into it.

"Testes..... one...... two....."


Jester laughs at his poor joke before continuing.

"Well now, did everyone have as much fun on Judgement as I did?"


The fans applaud and Jester laughs.

"The look on Hardcore Harry's face after that match was priceless. He just knew he had it won. Well, the joke's on him and Stanley because I guess there is no contender now. So I guess I will just go to Payback and argue with myself. Maybe this time I will win."


Jester begins to act as if he is arguing with himself.

"No you wont....Yes you will....No you wont"


Jester stops for a moment and then laughs even more.

"Oh it doesnt matter. Either way I will be walking out of Payback as the hardcore champion."


Jester pretends to argue with himself again.

"No you wont....Yes you will....No you wont....."


Jester regains himself a moment and then smiles.

"I feel like an atheist at his funeral. All dressed up with no place to go.. "


Jester starts laughing again when he is interrupted by..

tbc anyone

[hardcore harry]

About this time hardcore harry's music starts to play and he comes out carrying his barbed wire baseball bat, Helga in his right hand and a beer in the other. Harry walks slowly to the ring because of soreness from the last match.

Every few steps harry takes a little drink of beer and finally gets in to the ring. He points Helga at jester.

"You know at first I was a bit upset since I did all the work and you stole my pin. Then I got to thinking after the match that you did the same damn thing I would have done. So hell son I cannot get mad at you. I actually laughed after I thought about it."

Harry puts the bat back on his shoulder and raises his beer in a tribute to jester.

"All I really wanted to do in that match was to beat up that stan hanson fella. Anything after that was just extra. So I came down here to congratulate you and drink a beer."

Harry chugs down his beer and then crushes the can on his forehead.

[Stan "The Man" Hensen]

(Stan Hensen interrupts the two superstars as he makes an appearance on stage.)

This is just another prime example of how far the CRF has fallen. The hardcore champion is some Batman villain rip off and he can't even beat me without help.[/color]

(The crowd begins to boo but Stan ignores it. He points at Hardcore Harry next.)

Then we have harry sack of crap here. At least Jester doesn't hide the fact that he is a clown. You are too old and pathetic to intimidate anyone. Not only are you old but you smell bad and have absolutely no talent whatsoever. [/color]

(Stan turns his nose up at both of them while the crowd boos some more. After a few seconds Stan looks back at them and continues his insults.)

You two enjoy your little love fest while you can. Things are fixing to change around here and I can promise it WILL affect you both. If you are smart Jester you will come down here right now and just hand me that title. [/color]

(Stan waits there to see what comes next)

TBC Jester / Hardcore Harry

[Nemesis]

Jester responds to Stan with a loud laugh. He then makes a face and pretends as if he is scared to death of Stan.

"Oh no Harry, whatever will I do? Stan Stan the Man here is angry. I think we are not supposed to like him when he is angry...or any other time for that matter"

Jester laughs and twitches his head some.

"You have done nothing to earn a title shot at me. There is no points awarded for style in the CRF....or for your total lack of it..."

Jester pauses a moment and thinks.

"Now here's the deal Stanley. I have consulted with the voices in my head and they tell me that there is some overgrown kid in a Halloween costume demanding a fight against a member of eXtinction. "

Jester holds his hand out to Stan.

"No I am not talking about Boris or your other buddy this time, I am talking about Monster. Now I have a simply wonderful idea."

Jester touches his hands to his head as if he is thinking.

"Neither you nor Monster qualify for my title. However, I will gladly give you both a chance to win it, sort of. I talked with Fighter-X and he suggested I challenge you and Monster in a Jeopardy Triple Threat. I lose my title only if I get pinned."

Jester starts to dance a little and the monster mash song begins to play. Jester shouts at Stan.

"So what do you say buddy? You wanna do the mash? The Monster Mash......."

Jester starts laughing hysterically and waits for a reply.